February 2008

i don't really have much to write about.

so i'm probably going to blab. and not really say anything at all.

"son, fear is the heart of love."

i like to wonder about what causes people to write certain songs. like, what was going on in their life to inspire that? sometimes, it's better when you don't know the meaning of a song (or a poem or a painting, we don't need to limit this to music), because what it means to you is more special than what it actually means. but there are definitely some songs that you may not like or you end up liking much better than you first did once you find out what it actually means. mr. jones by the counting crows is definitely a song like that for me; i liked it before i found out what it was about, but now i absolutely love it. brick by ben folds five is another example.

now on the flip side, there are some songs i don't want to know what they're about. everlong by the foo fighters is one of those. i really like my interpretation of the song and i have a feeling that the real meaning isn't anywhere close to mine.

alright, i already got bored of writing this entry. i'm gonna go bite into a slab of swiss cheese and hopefully miss.

I am listening to Death Cab for Cutie - I Will Follow You into the Dark.

some people change the world.

so today when i was surfing the internet, i stumbled upon arguably the greatest dreamer this earth has ever seen. his name is walt disney. and his story is an inspiration to all of us.

"All your dreams can come true if you have the courage to pursue them."

i remember some time ago, specifically december 2005, when i went to walt disney world with my family. at epcot center, there was a quote from walt disney on a sign outside the place, and i remember reading it and thinking to myself, "man, this guy was amazing," and shedding a tear at it. it sucks because i don't remember the quote, and i can't seem to find it over the internet.

i think it really got to me because millions and millions of people around the world feeling the magic that was once his dream. he made his dream reality. now maybe that isn't saying much, but if you think about it for a second, think about your wildest dreams (not your sexual dreams, you sickos), and imagine it coming true. he believed in a fantasy world of his that one day the whole world would enjoy with him. and some how, some way, he made that reality.

most of our dreams are so out of this world that people don't actually pursue them. at some points in life, those dreams are so far-fetched that people just give up and not care about them anymore. what sets walt disney apart from the masses is that he never gave up. no matter how far-fetched or how ridiculous his dream was or how many setbacks he faced, he still kept pursuing it until finally one day, his dream came true. sometimes, that's really all it takes. and we all must not forget that.

"Always remember that this whole thing was started with a dream and a mouse."

I have used this song before for the song of the day, but it fits well for this entry: Final Fantasy VII OST - Sending a Dream into the Universe.

today is a voting day.

so some people get excited to head out to the polls today and vote in the primaries. others do not. and some of those that do not, don't vote in the general election. but that's someone's preference. i think it takes a lot for a person to not vote if he/she thinks that they don't know enough to make a good decision. i mean, it's a lot better than if someone curses voting as if it doesn't make a difference and it's a waste of time.

for some reason, i get really excited to vote. i wouldn't consider myself someone that knows everything about politics and eeks to hear the results, or campaigns for people and goes crazy about it. i just like the right to vote. that's as simple as it is.

you could say that i'm proud to be american. very much. i still get the shivers every time i hear the national anthem. it's kinda weird, but i think it's because i'm very grateful at the fact that my parents moved here and i wasn't brought up in india. no offense to that.

i guess that's all i want to say about that. i'm not deeply connected to sitting around yapping about politics and patriotism. i just wanted to get that out right now.

so another thing that also came into my head today is something that i thought about a long time ago, something that you hear a lot about when you're getting into college, but not so much as time goes on.

"i think i'm going to major in psychology because i like trying to understand what people are feeling and thinking and why they do what they do."

i swear everyone has thought that once in their life. but then everyone realizes that everyone thinks that and that you don't have to go into psychology to continue your career in figuring out people. because you'll end up doing that no matter what. maybe you'll get better. but probably not, since everyone's different.

my favorite poem expresses this idea in its first stanza:

"since feeling is first
who pays any attention
to the syntax of things
will never wholly kiss you;"

and that's the truth. it's a fancy way to say "good things come to those who wait," and it's also a way to tell you not to rip your eyes out trying to figure people out. because it won't get you anywhere.

and that's also why i'm not a psychologist.

So why don't you Slide? ...by the Goo Goo Dolls.

here we are again.

well, i think i'm gonna start updating my blog again. i obviously have some sort of a.d.d. with updating websites but at least if i have a bunch of things on here that i randomly update, then chances are something is going to be updated every day or every other day. well, who knows. i'm gonna bet on myself that i don't update this for much longer.

i guess that depends. everyone very well knows that people only really write when there's something important or pivotal going on in their lives. a lot of times people write just because they want a certain someone to read something, but they don't have half the guts or feel any bit in place to say what they want to say to their face. another time people write is when they honestly feel that their notebook (or virtual one) is their only solace at the moment, and becomes their best friend. but one time when people don't write is when there is bliss.

so i'm gonna guess that i continue to update this until i am comfortable enough about my surroundings that i feel there is nothing pivotal going on in my life. or most importantly, if i ever find myself in a state of bliss.

but i must say again, don't count on those words. i could easily stop updating tomorrow.

today was a special day. special enough to start something anew again.

A song like Gin Blossoms - Hey Jealousy really captures what should be important in one's memories.